標(biāo)題: 讀出字里行間 - Reading between the lines [打印本頁(yè)]
作者: hushe 時(shí)間: 2015-12-22 19:26
標(biāo)題: 讀出字里行間 - Reading between the lines
偶爾有閑暇的時(shí)候，就會(huì)找一本小說(shuō)讀讀。大部分時(shí)候都是一目十行的掠過(guò)，很少有駐目細(xì)細(xì)品嘗的時(shí)候，然后再細(xì)細(xì)想起，真正讓人感動(dòng)的，往往是那一兩個(gè)字的巧妙，恰好就觸動(dòng)了心里的某一個(gè)點(diǎn)，讓人悵然若失，或者無(wú)限的遐想。
記得最早閱讀到《Love Story》的時(shí)候，大約是在讀高中的時(shí)候，那時(shí)候?yàn)榱嗽黾佑⒄Z(yǔ)的課外閱讀量，每個(gè)月總會(huì)去縣城的新華書(shū)店去買(mǎi)《英語(yǔ)學(xué)習(xí)》，那是我接觸最早的學(xué)英語(yǔ)的雜志，薄薄的一本32開(kāi)本雜志，一些范文欣賞，一些語(yǔ)法用法講解，還有一些小故事。我也不記得具體是哪一期了，一直在連載《Love Story》。那時(shí)的我并未接觸到外部的世界，也不知道這篇小說(shuō)到底有什么特別指出，只是其中短短的一段話，讓我感受到了語(yǔ)言的感染力。
第21節(jié) （生死離別的時(shí)刻）
（Jeniffer 去世前與主人公在醫(yī)院的最后時(shí)刻）
........
That evening, she kicked me out of the room. She wanted to speak to her father 'man to man.'那天晚上，她(珍妮佛-女主人公)讓我離開(kāi)房間，她要和她父親做一次大人之間的談話。
'This meeting is restricted only to Americans of Italian descent,' she said, looking as white asher pillows, 'so beat it, Barrett.' “這個(gè)會(huì)議只局限于意大利后裔的美國(guó)人”，她說(shuō)，“離去吧，巴雷特” - 這個(gè)會(huì)議指珍妮和父親菲力(phil)的談話。
'Okay,' I said. “好的”，我說(shuō)。
'But not too far,'she said when I reached the door.“不要走遠(yuǎn)了”，當(dāng)我走到門(mén)口時(shí)，她說(shuō)到。
I went to sit in the lounge. Presently Phil appeared. 我去到休息間坐著等，很快看到Phil過(guò)來(lái)了。
'She says to get your ass in there,' he whispered hoarsely, like the whole inside of him was hollow.'I'm gonna buy some cigarettes.'“她說(shuō)讓你過(guò)去”，他低聲說(shuō)著，聲音嘶啞，好像是在一個(gè)山洞中�！拔胰ベI(mǎi)煙去。” ---- get your ass in there, 把屁股挪過(guò)去。
'Close the goddamn door,' she commanded as I entered the room. “把該死的門(mén)關(guān)上”，當(dāng)我進(jìn)屋時(shí)，她命令到。
I obeyed, shut the door quietly,and as I went back to sit by her bed, I caught a fuller view of her. I mean,with the tubes going into her right arm, which she would keep under the covers.I always liked to sit very close and just look at her face, which, however pale, still had her eyes shining in it. 我按她的要求安靜地把門(mén)關(guān)上，回到她床邊坐下，全面仔細(xì)地看她。我是說(shuō)，她的右臂上插著一些管子，這些管子把她遮住了。我總是喜歡坐在她身邊，就只是看著她。此刻她的面孔有點(diǎn)蒼白，眼睛依然閃亮。
So I quickly sat very close. 我坐到她身邊，緊靠著她。
'It doesn't hurt,Ollie, really,' she said. 'It's like falling off a cliff in slow motion, you know?' “不要緊，奧利弗”，她說(shuō)，“就像是用慢動(dòng)作從懸崖上墜落，知道嗎？”
Something stirred deep in my gut. Some shapeless thing that was going to fly into my throat and make me cry. But I wasn't going to. I never have. I'm a tough bastard, see? I am not gonna cry. 有些東西在我肚子里攪動(dòng)，好像有無(wú)形的東西要飛到我的嗓子，讓我哭泣。但我不能哭，不應(yīng)哭。瞧，我就是個(gè)完完全全的混蛋，我不會(huì)哭。
But if I'm not gonna cry, then I can't open my mouth. I'll simply have to nod yes. So I nodded yes.但是如果不哭出來(lái)，我無(wú)法張嘴說(shuō)話。我只有簡(jiǎn)單地點(diǎn)頭說(shuō)是。于是我點(diǎn)了點(diǎn)頭。
'Bullshit,' she said. “狗屎”，她說(shuō)。
'Huh?' It was more of a grunt than a word.“嗯？”她只是嘟囔一下。
'You don't know about falling off cliffs, Preppie,' she said. 'You never fell off one in your god damn life.'“你不知道從懸崖上掉下來(lái)是怎么回事，預(yù)科生�！彼f(shuō)道�！霸谀阍撍赖纳钪�，你又從來(lái)沒(méi)有掉下去過(guò)�！�
'Yeah,' I said,recovering the power of speech. 'When I met you.'“是”，我說(shuō)，我已經(jīng)恢復(fù)了語(yǔ)言能力，“在我遇到你之前”
'Yeah,' she said, anda smile crossed her face. ''Oh, what a falling off was there.' Who said that?' “是”，她說(shuō)，臉上一片笑容�！芭�，那是多大的差距啊 - 那是誰(shuí)說(shuō)得？”
'I don't know,' I replied. 'Shakespeare.' “我不知道，”我回答到，“莎士比亞�！�
'Yeah, but who?' she said kind of plaintively. 'I can't remember which play, even. I went to Radcliffe,I should remember things. I once knew all the Mozart Köchel listings.' “是啊，還有誰(shuí)？”她用平靜地神態(tài)說(shuō)道�！拔叶疾恢朗钦l(shuí)在演戲。我到了拉德克利夫，我應(yīng)該能記得的，我曾經(jīng)記得完整的莫扎特的清單。”
'Big deal,' I said.“了不起”，我說(shuō)。
'You bet it was,' she said, and then screwed up her forehead, asking, 'What number is the C MinorPiano Concerto?'“你敢賭？”她說(shuō)道，眉頭皺了起來(lái)，問(wèn)道�！癈小調(diào)剛琴協(xié)奏曲的編號(hào)是多少？” ---- 指莫扎特的C小調(diào)鋼琴協(xié)奏曲No24吧？
'I'll look it up,' Isaid.“我查一下”，我說(shuō)。
I knew just where.Back in the apartment, on a shelf by the piano. I would look it up and tell herfirst thing tomorrow.我知道在哪里，回到公寓，在鋼琴邊上的書(shū)架上。我要看一下，明天第一件事告訴她。
'I used to know,'Jenny said, 'I did. I used to know.'“我以前記得，”珍妮說(shuō)道，“真的，我以前記得�！�
'Listen,' I said,Bogart style, 'do you want to talk music?'“聽(tīng)著，”我用鮑加的語(yǔ)調(diào)說(shuō)到，“你要談?wù)撘魳?lè)嗎？” --- Humphrey Bogart，美國(guó)電影演員。
'Would you prefer talking funerals?' she asked.“難道你準(zhǔn)備談葬禮？”她問(wèn)道。
'No,' I said, sorry for having interrupted her.“不，”我說(shuō)，很后悔打斷了她的話題。
'I discussed it with Phil. Are you listening, Ollie?' “我跟菲力說(shuō)過(guò)了。你在聽(tīng)嗎，奧利？”
I had turned my face away. 我把臉轉(zhuǎn)到了一邊。
'Yeah, I'm listening,Jenny.'“是的，珍妮，我在聽(tīng)�！�
'I told him he could have a Catholic service, you'd say okay. Okay?' “我告訴他可以按照天主教的儀式辦理，你同意吧。好不？”
'Okay,' I said.“好�！蔽艺f(shuō)到。
'Okay,' she replied.“好�！彼貜�(fù)到。
And then I felt slightly relieved, because after all, whatever we talked of now would have to be an improvement. 我感到有點(diǎn)點(diǎn)釋然，無(wú)論如何，后面的談話都不會(huì)有所改變了。
I was wrong. 我錯(cuò)了。
'Listen, Oliver,'said Jenny, and it was in her angry voice, albeit soft. 'Oliver, you've got to stop being sick!' “聽(tīng)著，奧利，”珍妮說(shuō)道，她的聲音盡管很柔，但幾乎要憤怒了，“奧利，你不能再這樣消沉了�！�
'Me?'“我？”
'That guilty look on your face, Oliver, it's sick.'“看看你臉上的土灰樣，太消沉了�！�
Honestly, I tried to change my expression, but my facial muscles were frozen.老實(shí)說(shuō)，我想盡可能表現(xiàn)好點(diǎn)，可是面部肌肉總好像僵了一樣。
'It's nobody's fault,you preppie bastard,' she was saying. 'Would you please stop blaming yourself!' “這不是誰(shuí)的錯(cuò)，你個(gè)破預(yù)科生，”她在一直說(shuō)，“不要再責(zé)怪自己了。” ----
I wanted to keep looking at her because I wanted to never take my eyes from her, but still I had to lower my eyes, I was so ashamed that even now Jenny was reading my mind so perfectly.我想一直看著她，不想把我的目光從她身上移開(kāi)，但我還是不得不低下頭，我感到如此難過(guò)，珍妮這個(gè)時(shí)候還是那樣關(guān)心我。
'Listen, that's the only goddamn thing I'm asking, Ollie. Otherwise, I know you'll be okay.'“聽(tīng)著，那是我唯一想知道的事。奧利，我知道，你一定會(huì)沒(méi)事的�！�
That thing in my gut was stirring again, so I was afraid to even speak the word 'okay.' I just looked mutely at Jenny.我的腸胃再次翻攪起來(lái)，甚至再也說(shuō)不出一個(gè)“沒(méi)事的”。我只有靜靜地看著珍妮。
'Screw Paris,' she said suddenly.“Screw Paris”, 她突然說(shuō)道。
'Huh?' “嗯？”
'Screw Paris and music and all the crap you think you stole from me. I don't care, you sonovabitch.Can't you believe that?' “Screw Paris 和音樂(lè)和其他你想從我這里偷到的雜碎，我都不在乎，你個(gè)混蛋。你不相信嗎？”
'No,' I answered truthfully. “不，”我老實(shí)回答道。
'Then get the hell out of here,' she said. 'I don't want you at my goddamn deathbed.'“不信就從這里滾出去，”她說(shuō)，“我不想你在這里給我送葬�！�
She meant it. I could tell when Jenny really meant something. So I bought permission to stay by telling a lie: 她說(shuō)的是真的。我清楚地知道珍妮的意思，于是我要說(shuō)謊，以便留下來(lái)。
'I believe you,' I said.“我信你”，我說(shuō)。
'That's better,' she said. 'Now would you do me a favor?' “那樣最好”，她說(shuō)，“好，現(xiàn)在給我?guī)蛡�(gè)忙好嗎？”
From somewhere inside me came this devastating assault to make me cry. But I withstood. I would not cry. I would merely indicate to Jennifer - by the affirmative nodding of myhead - that I would be happy to do her any favor whatsoever.我突然感到一種毀滅性打擊讓我要哭出來(lái)。但我忍了，我不要哭。我肯定地向珍妮點(diǎn)點(diǎn)頭 - 不管她說(shuō)什么我都會(huì)照著做。
'Would you please hold me very tight?' she asked. “緊緊抱著我，好嗎？”她問(wèn)道。
I put my hand on her forearm - Christ, so thin - and gave it a little squeeze. 我把手放在她小臂上 - 天啊，這么消瘦 - 稍稍用力。
'No, Oliver,' she said, 'really hold me. Next to me.' “不，奧利”，她說(shuō)，“真的抱著我，靠著我。”
I was very, very careful - of the tubes and things - as I got onto the bed with her and put my arms around her. 我非常小心，非常小心 - 那么多管子還有其它 - 到床上，用雙臂抱著她的身體。
'Thanks, Ollie.'“謝謝，奧利”
Those were her lastwords. 這是她留下的最后的話。
這是生死離別的時(shí)刻，希望心愛(ài)的人能夠堅(jiān)強(qiáng)的活下去。通篇的文字通俗易懂，真實(shí)的熱切的情感就流淌在樸實(shí)無(wú)華的文字之間。It touched my soul, moved me in deep. 文字要表述的意思，無(wú)論多么高明的導(dǎo)演和演員，都無(wú)法完整準(zhǔn)確的再現(xiàn)。這就是文字的魅力。
在讀大學(xué)的第一次英語(yǔ)課堂上，年輕的老師給我們播放了一首英語(yǔ)歌曲，同樣讓我喜歡上了英語(yǔ)閱讀。那是一個(gè)秋日的午后，一個(gè)聲音單薄的女孩子的聲音，在教室里回響：
......
Oh-oh-oh sa-a-a-d movies always make me cry喔……悲傷電影總令我哭泣，
Oh-oh-oh sa-a-a-d movies always make me cry喔……悲傷電影總令我哭泣，
......
整個(gè)歌詞講述的故事其實(shí)很簡(jiǎn)單，就是一個(gè)失戀的女孩子，碰到戀人和其他女孩在一起，哭著回家，告訴媽媽，傷感電影讓自己流淚哭泣。那個(gè)單薄的聲音，沒(méi)有嘈鬧的重金屬，就只剩下”Sad movies，always make me cry“這樣回味悠長(zhǎng)的主題。
1990年的跨年晚會(huì)上，外語(yǔ)系一同學(xué)一曲“Last Waltz”，更是蕩氣回腸。時(shí)到今日，那種悠揚(yáng)渾厚的旋律，純白的晚禮服，依然記憶猶新。The last waltz will last forever .....，那種美，令人窒息，讓你全身心回到了熙熙攘攘的舞池中，你的眼睛中卻始終只有一個(gè)你，一曲又一曲，永遠(yuǎn)也不想到那曲終人散之時(shí)，希望 last waltz will last forever......
外語(yǔ)作為一種技能，不只是工作的工具，更是給你打開(kāi)了一扇門(mén)，讓你看到更為精彩的世界，讓你有機(jī)會(huì)欣賞另一份美麗，給自己更多的精彩。
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